What Orna Guralnik has said about Relationship conflict

Guralnik says a key issue in arguments is noticing whether one is trying to convince the partner versus trying to understand them.

“Are you noticing when you're busy trying to convince your partner of something? And when are you actually trying to understand them?”

Call Her Daddy: Dr. Orna Guralnik: Couples Therapy 101 (FBF) (Nov 4, 2026) · Listen from 11:46

Guralnik recommends keeping an inner voice reminding oneself that a fight is probably about more than the surface issue, and pausing when overheated.

“I'm sure it's not only about this. There must be other things going on for me that I'm not exactly aware of right now”

Call Her Daddy: Dr. Orna Guralnik: Couples Therapy 101 (FBF) (Nov 4, 2026) · Listen from 15:05

Guralnik argues relationships are not meant to be picture-perfect and that partners using and discharging on each other in small ways is part of life.

“relationships are not supposed to be this kind of hallmark, picture-perfect sweetness thing. It's a place where people live and discharge on each other”

Call Her Daddy: Dr. Orna Guralnik: Couples Therapy 101 (FBF) (Nov 4, 2026) · Listen from 18:13

Guralnik draws the line at conflict driven by the thrill of injury or retaliation, while noting not every fight is abuse.

“if the thrill of injury is what takes over or of retaliation or injury, that's when I draw the line and I'm like, no”

Call Her Daddy: Dr. Orna Guralnik: Couples Therapy 101 (FBF) (Nov 4, 2026) · Listen from 19:14