What Sabrina Zohar has said about Attachment theory

Zohar argues that people often mistake familiar relational dynamics for safety because familiarity reflects how they kept themselves safe in childhood.

“is familiar familiar because it feels good or is familiar because that's just how you've kept yourself safe in the past?”

On Purpose with Jay Shetty: Sabrina Zohar: How to Stop Chasing People Who Don’t Want You (Oct 7, 2026) · Listen from 3:20

Zohar argues that anxious and avoidant people need each other because each style contains elements of the other.

“Anxious and avoidant people need each other. So anxious people are also avoidant and avoidant people are also anxious”

On Purpose with Jay Shetty: Sabrina Zohar: How to Stop Chasing People Who Don’t Want You (Oct 7, 2026) · Listen from 34:33

Zohar explains that avoidant partners return after a breakup because distance removes the triggering stimulus.

“Do you want to know why avoidant people come back? Because they have space from the stimulus”

On Purpose with Jay Shetty: Sabrina Zohar: How to Stop Chasing People Who Don’t Want You (Oct 7, 2026) · Listen from 34:39

Zohar advises against asking about attachment style on a date, arguing that people self-identify poorly and that attachment styles are fluid.

“My least favorite question to ask on a date. People do it all the time. What's your attachment style? First of all, people are terrible at self-identifying”

On Purpose with Jay Shetty: Sabrina Zohar: How to Stop Chasing People Who Don’t Want You (Oct 7, 2026) · Listen from 39:42